


And you were once all it was

by bookwrm130



Category: Jane the Virgin (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Originally Posted on Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2018-05-11
Packaged: 2019-05-05 08:50:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14614524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookwrm130/pseuds/bookwrm130
Summary: She had it all. A steady income, amazing children, good friends, and an amazing lover. Or at least she did. But she ruined it all and now Jane had left her.





	And you were once all it was

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this on [my tumblr](http://bookwrm130.tumblr.com). Moving it here to archive plus some edits.

Petra sat at her desk, her mind everywhere but. The past few days had been excruciating. The intrusion to her house. The gun shot. Jane. Oh _Jane_. She remembered her face, screaming, yelling, tears barely restrained. How could she have messed this up? They had just admitted their love to one another. Jane was moving in. She was bonding with her girls. She thought they would be able to be a family, the four of them.

How foolish of her to think that she deserved to be happy.

The investigation of the break in and who did what and why didn’t even phase her anymore. Murder, attempted or otherwise, have become such a norm to her life now. Trying to focus on the papers that she had to sign in front of her, all she could think about is how much she had ruined and if she could ever fix it.

She was broken out of her thoughts by the ringing of her cellphone. Seeing the name on the screen, she could feel her heart suddenly beating against her ribcage. On the screen was the photo of JR she took while she was still in bed, gorgeous even when she just woke up.

Petra took a deep breath, letting a million possibilities run through her head. 

“Hello?” Despite her best effort, Petra couldn’t contain the hope in her voice.

“I left some files at your place. Can I drop by at 2 to pick them up?” JR's voice was cold, with no emotions behind it at all.

“Y-yes, of course. I’ll be out of the office by then.” That was a lie, Petra had so many things to take care of.

“Alright.”

Petra opened her mouth as if she was about to say something, but was cut off by JR ending the call. Petra stared at her phone, trying to get her thoughts straight. She wasn’t sure if she was dreading or looking forward to seeing JR again.

* * *

Precisely at 2, Petra heard a knock at the door of the suite. She had been sitting at her couch, fiddling with her phone, with her hands, with anything within her reach. For the past hour or so, she’d been fixing her hair, then put on makeup, took them off, before deciding to put some back on again, just so that she doesn’t look like she hadn’t slept in days. 

Petra opened the door and there stood JR, still as beautiful as ever. Unlike the last time JR stood in front of her door, there was no smile on her face, no inkling of mirth or amusement at Petra’s antics. Just a blank face, trying to show as little as possible.

“Hey,” Petra said so softly, it was almost a whisper.

JR’s broke a little, concern showing for a split second, but it was quickly buried into the blank mask it wore.

“I think I left my files in your bedside drawer.”

“Uh, yeah, come in.” Petra moved aside to let JR in. Seeing JR in her home again, walking around like she knew the place, like she  _belongs_ , hurt more than she thought it could. Petra followed JR to their- her bedroom. JR went to the bedside drawer and quickly grabbed the files she mentioned. Holding up the folder to show Petra she had acquired what she needed, she swiftly walked towards the door.

Panicking that JR was leaving so quickly, Petra called out, “Jane, wait!”

JR stopped in her track and turned around, waiting.

Petra stood there, trying to make words come out of her mouth. Petra did not plan this part at all.

The silence was broken by the sound of the door opening and four little feet running in.

“JR!” The twins ran towards JR and hugged her, one girl on each side.

“Hey, girls!” JR said, crouching down to hug them both back.

“Are you gonna come play with us?” Anna said. “Yeah! We have this new game on the iPad!” Ellie followed. The both of them ping-ponged back and forth about how great this game is and all the pretty colors and shapes and how Ellie was better than Anna but Anna said that’s because Ellie keeps hogging it and so on and so forth.

JR smiled at the two girls, letting them talk a mile a minute before she looked up at Petra. Petra looked like she was about to cry, seeing her girls getting along with JR. Not wanting the girls to see their mother cry, JR interrupted them. “That sounds great, girls, but I really have to go.” 

The twins quitted down, little frowns adorning their faces. “Oh.” Ellie said. “When will you be back?” Anna said. JR looked at Petra again. “I don’t know,” she sighed.

“Okay,” both girls said defeatedly. Not wanting to completely let the girls down, JR looked up at Petra and said, “I might have a day off soon. If I do, I’ll let your mommy know. How about that, sounds good?”

“Yeah!” The girls then hugged JR and ran off to do who knows what. JR stood up and was about to leave when Petra once again called out to her.

“Do you really mean that?”

JR sighed. “Maybe.” She then turned around to properly look at Petra. “I’m still mad and so much is happening right now but…” JR looked towards the girls behind Petra. “I still care about you,” she sighed. “Once the dust settles, you and I can talk again.”

Petra would take any chance to fix this. “Yes, of course.” A pause. “I really am sorry, Jane.”

And with a crack in her voice that finally betrayed her emotions, JR said, “I know. It doesn’t make it hurt any less.”

JR walked out and closed the door behind her. Petra stood, hurt but slightly hopeful that maybe, just maybe, she might be able to fix everything.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hoo boy. Let me tell ya, I don't usually write angst but this just wouldn't leave my head when I was writing it. Hence it being on tumblr first because it wasn't planned. It was mostly written for the twins/JR interaction. I wanted to see how the twins would react, because yes, they like her, but they haven't really bonded with her. I also originally wanted to write a scene about the girls comforting their mother, but I just couldn't figure out how to do it. Maybe some other time.


End file.
